Weight LossAre You Eating to Kill Anger?
Most overweight people eat to overcome, diffuse or “kill” certain uncomfortable feelings. We live in stressful times and high stress generates uncomfortable feelings. But very few of us have been taught effective skills to manage those feelings. So we handle them the best way we can — we eat.
But eating to kill feelings causes its own set of problems: fat, of course, but also additional painful feelings. Then we have to eat even more. We get caught in a self-perpetuating cycle.
What do we do about it? The effective answer is to become aware of and manage your feelings. Today, I want to focus on anger.
Everybody feels angry at some time. People who say they don’t are deluding themselves. Anger is a natural and necessary human emotion. When anger is handled properly, it can be useful and healthy. When anger is chronically suppressed, it can contribute to depression, weight gain and other health problems.
Many of us are scared of our anger. Well-meaning but uninformed family members, religious groups and school systems have taught us that anger is bad, unnecessary, unfeminine, dangerous and destructive. No wonder we eat to kill anger.
So what can you do to stop?
1. Admit that you get angry.
2. Buy some books that help you understand anger.
3. Make a list of everything that angers you.
4. Make a second list of productive, positive ways to deal with the items on your “angry list.”
5. Make a list of the people in your life you need to communicate your anger to. Get a third person to help the conversation stay on track and remain productive. Then, go and talk it out.
Your ability to manage your anger will increase even if you do only one of these suggestions. Start with the easiest, safest one and work from there.
[Ed. note: Dr Matthew Anderson is an author (The Prayer Diet), counselor (35 years) and national columnist/expert on weight loss, motivation, self-management and relationships. To find tough-minded, outside-the-box guidance for taking charge of your life and/or your weight including Eating to Kill, Wake-Up 101 and Weight Loss as a Spiritual Journey, click here.]
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Tags: anger, emotional well-being, motivation, obesity, Weight Loss
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