As a practicing clinical psychologist I am often astounded by how little insight people have into their emotions. For many, emotions are inexplicable and somewhat mysterious aspects of human nature. Some believe their emotions should be ignored. Others assume that by following their feelings they will find happiness, contentment and satisfaction with life.

In fact, neither way of handling feelings is truly effective in an attempt to find and hold onto emotional well-being. What enhances our potential for achieving emotional well-being is the ability to make sense of the emotions we experience in daily life.

The first step in making sense of your emotions is realizing that all emotions are a matter of how we are situated with respect to those things, people and events we believe to be essential to our overall emotional well-being. Take fear, for example. Walking down the street you suddenly hear a bus bearing down on you at high rate speed. You instantaneously become frightened because this thing coming at you threatens your safety, an essential aspect of your emotional well-being.

The second step in making sense of emotions consists of realizing that we find love and joy when we are in direct contact with who or what we consider essential. Like fear, anxiety surfaces when there is a threat to what we believe is essential to our emotional well-being. But unlike fear, where the threat is clear and present, with anxiety the threat is vague and not yet here.

We become depressed when we lose something or someone we consider essential. We become angry when someone unfairly does something that results in a threat to or loss of something or someone we believe to be essential. Envy occurs when we encounter someone who has something or someone we believe would enhance our emotional well-being. We become jealous when we worry someone may take away something or someone we consider essential.

Next time you feel love or joy or the next time you become frightened, anxious, depressed, angry, envious or jealous, take a look at how that emotion relates to how you are situated with respect to a thing, person, or event that seems to be essential to your emotional-well being. As this connection becomes clearer, you will be better able to make use of your emotions in your efforts at becoming happier and more satisfied with life.

[Ed. Note: Dr. Douglas Ramm is a psychologist, philosopher, author and leading researcher in the field of emotional well being, contentment and life satisfaction. He has appeared on numerous radio and television talk shows where he shares insights for enhancing quality of life. Discover how to enhance yours here.]

For more great articles like this delivered to your inbox, subscribe to our free natural health newsletter!