Why do some people live life like a great adventure and others — with just as much talent, time and money — walk through life as if it were a death march?

Most people sabotage their health, wellness and success because… they don’t use their brain the right way.

Your brain has virtually unlimited power and ability, but you must learn how it works in order to use it efficiently enough to create the life of your dreams. 

If you have been reading any of the wonderful self-help books that have been published in the last 30 years, you may have thought that the foundation for health, wellness and success  is the skill of positive thinking, learning to elicit powerful mind/body states or developing a healthy self-esteem. 

While a strong foundation is imperative, you may be surprised to hear it is never the place to start in the process of building.

Every experienced builder knows the first step is always to check for bedrock before you lay a foundation.  The bedrock on which to build the life of your dreams is learning how to monitor and transform your questions…the questions you are constantly asking yourself. 

Here is what any reputable brain researcher would tell you about that grey matter you carry around inside your head:

• The brain, by its very nature, must answer every question you pose.
• When you ask a question, your subconscious mind springs into action and starts pulling from any of the estimated 10 million facts you have stored as probable answers to your question.
• The subconscious is not logical at all, and does not concern itself with the outcome this answer will have on your mind and body.
• The body immediately recognizes the direction your mind is taking and automatically registers a matching body state.
• Constantly asking ourselves questions is such a natural and instinctive process to learning and being –we rarely even realize we are doing it several thousand times a day.

The more we learn how to harness the power of our natural brain processes, by monitoring and transforming the questions we ask ourselves, the greater opportunity we have to build a beautiful life.

Here’s how to start the process:

Step 1. Take a moment to check in with your body. Use your body as the ultimate feedback mechanism it is by taking the time to notice when it is registering a negative mood or mind/body feeling state.

Step 2. Identify the negative question creating your negative mood. It isn’t as hard as it sounds — typically, you’ll recognize it as one you have been repeatedly asking yourself and, perhaps, even muttering under your breath.

Step 3. Notice how your body responds.  When you concentrate on this question, notice where your body registers a response (stomach knots up, chest feels heavy, throat constricts, neck aches, or head pounds.)

Step 4. Transform your question with the magic word, HOW.  Nearly every negative question starts with a “Why.”  The magic word “How” empowers you to strike bedrock and begin anchoring a beautiful question. 

For example, Cindy, one of my client’s — when faced with the anxiety of losing her job — made this simple, yet powerful, shift with the magic word “how:”     

Cindy’s negative question:
“What am I going to do if I lose my job?”

Cindy’s transformation:
“How am I going to handle changes in my life?”

It is easy to understand the difference even this simple shift will make in the outcome of her mood and her ability to take action in life.

Step 5. Add exciting, wonderful words until your mind, body and spirit signals you have built something beautiful. The power of your question is dependent upon the power the words you select has on you.  Cindy continued to polish her question until these shining words appeared:

“How can I trust that this momentary obstacle is a necessary step on my journey toward achieving my full potential?”

Notice Cindy’s addition of power words such as “trust,” and “momentary” combined with wonderful phrases like “necessary step,” “journey toward,” and “achieving my full potential.”   What power words can you select that would transform and ready you to confidently move forward toward a life of your dreams?

Have the courage to continue to play with your question by adding positive words that imbue you with power and purpose — each time checking in with your body — and soon your mind will clear, your body will relax and your spirit will soar.  

[Ed. Note: C. Dean Hall, M.S., is a licensed clinical marriage and family therapist, author, speaker and one of the most experienced hypnotherapists in the nation.  His weekly advice column Thinking Like a Therapist is published in several newspapers across the nation.  Widely regarded by his colleagues as a clinical innovator, Dean has developed several therapeutic programs and CDs for stress management, published two surgery preparation programs and written two books.  You can find out more about Dean at www.cdeanhall.com.]

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